Tag Archives: Godzilla

The NBA Conspiracy Minute: 6-15-14 Game 2

15 Jun

I knew that there was going to be another conspiracy right around the corner. This one isn’t a huge one, but it is worth pointing out because it adds a whole new layer of genius to the San Antonio Spurs and the basketball omnipresence of Greg Popovich. But before I dive in to the conspiracy, I just want to give a little backstory on my relationship with the Spurs. I never really liked them, even when uber-Christian David Robinson was being jammed down my throat by every Sunday school teacher who noticed that I liked basketball I wasn’t a fan. As a kid there was more than one moral lesson revolving around how Christians were better at basketball allowing them to defeat the vile worldliness of crass hooligans like Charles Barkley. All I knew was Barkley beat Godzilla and in my elementary mind there was no amount of Christian magazine features on David Robinson that could take that away from me. So, not a huge fan to begin with. The 1996 season when David Robinson and Sean Elliot were out the majority of the season, thus allowing them to win the Timothy Duncan lottery, my favorite team the Denver Nuggets only had 2 more wins than the Spurs. WE COULD’VE HAD THE GREATEST CENTER/FORWARD IN THE WORLD!! So, for the next decade I held a grudge against the Spurs, so much so that I actively booed Avery Johnson when the Nuggets picked him up. I rooted against them in every playoffs series they played in, which broke my heart because that meant I had to root for the Lakers some years. I grew up thinking they were boring and outright villainous when they regularly beat the Suns. In summation, I’ll say the Spurs had a long way to go to earn my respect. And this is an old story, the stories of people hating the Spurs and coming around to respect them were in vogue two or three years ago after they changed their style to be more seven-second-Suns instead of their former grind-it-out selves, and it happened for me then also. I appreciated them the same time everyone else did, but now this years version of the Spurs are possibly the best basketball team I have ever seen in my life. And they are crushing the Miami Heat. And doing it in the most joyful, entertaining way.

photo (3)

Having said that, there is a conspiracy theory tied to these Spurs. As I said before, it’s not a very deep one, they don’t need a Deep Throat to uncover it. My theory is that the Spurs knew they were going to crush the Heat, just down right embarrass them, like they’ve done the last two games. And because they were so confident they would win the title they lost game two on purpose so they could win the close out game back on their home court in front their fans who would appreciate it much more than faux-fans of Miami. Well, it didn’t look like they actively tried to lose, but in contrast to their dominating performances in game 3 and 4, it is a wonder how they could have ever lost a game to this Heat team. What I think happened was that Popovich implicated a game plan that didn’t focus as much on ball movement or elements of the game they knew the Heat could react to. It was the playing-everyone version of letting Duncan and crew skip the game in Miami during the regular season. I think it is a very unlikely scenario that any team, especially the Spurs, would willingly lose a NBA Finals game, but after the last two games it makes me wonder how they lost game two. What likely happened was that Pop made the proper adjustments which allowed the Spurs to let their super-dominate colors shine. He is such an amazing basketball mind that he could for two consecutive games anticipate every thing that the Heat were going to do to try to stop their attack and not just design something that Erik Spolstra won’t be excepting, but something that will exploit every hole he didn’t even realize existed. Spolstra is a good coach, but he relies on having the horses. I get the sneaking suspicion that Popovich would still get a team like the Bobcats (RIP) to fifty-plus wins just because he is a master at understanding the game and utilizing his personnel. This is why I think that there is a good chance that Pop willingly allowed his team to lose game two. If that isn’t the case then maybe LeBron is really as good as people say he is because this Spurs team looks flawless. They look invincible and play together so well, I’m a little shocked that they even lost one game the whole year. 

-C.Charles 

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Look it’s GODZILLA The Movie Review

26 May

When I discovered a reboot of Godzilla was being made, it triggered a flashback. Suppressed memories of that wretched movie Roland Emmerich sold as “Godzilla” resurfaced. I recalled the childish Siskel and Ebert insults, the scientist testing an asexual mutated lizard with home pregnancy tests, the Puff Daddy theme song, it was awful. That’s the first Godzilla movie I’d ever seen in theaters, so upon discovering there was soon to be another, I groaned in disappointment. Then I realized there’s no way this new movie could possibly be worse than that 1998 atrocity, and kept an open mind. I’ve seen the last half of the American black and white classic Godzilla, as well as clips and segments from various Japanese movies, like Godzilla vs. Space Godzilla. So I am familiar with the lore and have come to expect certain things. This was my first opportunity to see Godzilla in 3D, so I ponied up a couple extra bucks for the 3D, since it was a cheap matinee show during the week. This is how I go to movies, middle of the day, middle of the week. There’s only ever like 11 people there so you can chat with friends without being shushed by the people around you.

Godzilla movie poster

At this point someone seeing Godzilla outta know what it’s basically about. I don’t feel like I’ll be giving anything away but I’ll try not to spoil the few pleasant surprises the movie has. This incarnation of Godzilla has just enough awesome moments to pull you through the illogical nonsense that constitutes the bulk of the film. Like any good monster movie Godzilla starts out by addressing the problems of nuclear radiation. Bryan Cranston works at a Japanese nuclear power plant, his readouts indicate there’s trouble a coming. Who knew Bryon Cranston speaking intense Japanese would be so funny? His wife played by Juliette Binoche works there too. She’s in the wrong place when the shaking starts and they seal up her section to contain leaking radiation. She dies in the first 5 minutes, this movie coulda used more Juliette Binoche, hell most movies could. Having an earthquake cause a meltdown at a Japanese nuclear plant might cause people to grumble “too soon”. Remember it’s just a movie, at least there isn’t a tsunami sequence showing debris of cars, buildings, and people being washed up the coasts of Japan…that happens in Hawaii. Bryan Cranston sneaks back to the quarantined site decades later and learns that there’s a giant cocoon “feeding on radiation” in the remnants of the old plant. The scientist studying it cause it to hatch and a giant surprise comes out. Breaking Bad fans hoping for a showdown between Heisenberg and Godzilla better brace themselves. Cranston dies and with him goes the last interesting human character of the film, that’s okay this movie is about huge monsters.

We’re left with Bryan’s grown son Ford (actual name) if you close your eyes Ford has the voice of an old lady. Ford is in the military which is fighting the monster, sort of. The whole way this movie handles the military is very confusing, they don’t know what to do about Godzilla and when they do it makes no sense. Nuclear bomb tests in the 50’s were actually failed attempts to kill Godzilla. The scientist now says a new monster called “Muto” is the real problem, Mutos feed on radiation and Godzilla preys on Mutos. It’s nature’s way of maintaining balance, that’s why we couldn’t kill Godzilla in the 50’s. So Navy ships are escorting Godzilla to intercept the Mutos, when they do the military plans to bomb all three at once, or something I don’t care about. I just want to see monsters destroying things. On the list of impossible things that would never happen, I do hope if there was some mythical creature that eats up radiation, humanity would have the good sense to not kill it. Instead the military plans to detonate a nuclear bomb to kill three radiation fueled beasts. I don’t know if the movie is trying to be funny with this ridiculousness, same goes for when Ford points his pistol at the 300 foot goliath staring him down, sure buddy that’ll stop it. The worst part is when Ford the “bomb specialist” can’t defuse his own bomb because of a piece of cracked glass mounted over the timer.

Godzilla Bridge

Despite its many problems I still enjoyed Godzilla, here’s why. Godzilla stories are supposed to be over the top and silly. Godzilla is about destruction on an epic scale, we got that, especially since the monsters have their own special weaponry. Godzilla has got some really great suspenseful moments, the beginning scene in the nuclear plant kicks up the pace nice and early. There’s a great scene in Hawaii where Ford is on a train and the power goes out, after a while the lights come back on and Muto is on the tracks ahead of them, everybody is already panicking, then the train starts moving forward again, I thought “Here we go”. There’s just enough fun scenes that are so well put together, and look spectacular that it holds your attention through all the petty human drama. The real strength in this movie is that for all his power and terror Godzilla is who you cheer for. By the end I thought Godzilla was more like a big overgrown kid who didn’t know his own strength. The film only skipped two monster movie clichés I really wanted to see; Japanese people fleeing in horror yelling “Run, it’s Godzilla!”. And having a scientist look up, slowly take off his glasses, and dramatically say “My God”. Other than that Godzilla delivers everything you could want. My interest in Godzilla is renewed and am actually watching Godzilla vs. King Ghidorah on cable as I type this.

 

Carl Wells